"Creatio Ex Nihilo" to create something out of nothing. I've recently just finished 5 years of Bible college and I have read & studied about God doing some pretty mind-blowing things; but for me personally, creatio ex nihilo is still one of the coolest. I find this act of God so astounding because not only did He create things that had NEVER previously existed, but He did so effortlessly. He simply opened His mouth & spoke things into being....into existence....into motion. Keep in mind these are things that had never previously existed, anywhere, ever. These were not small things that were being spoken into existence, God Almighty here (Gen 1) is speaking the sky, oceans, mountains, sunsets, planets, stars, entire solar systems & galaxies (one's we haven't even discovered yet!)into being. And just like that...He speaks...and all of sudden...what wasn't, now is...
Tonight I had dinner with 3 local believers who are kinda the core of the Chi Alpha Campus Ministries (XA for short) that is being started at the prestigious U.P. Diliman. Angie is the oldest and is the pastor's wife of a nearby congregation, Carin is 28 & works at a software place doing I.T. help and attends Angie's church along with Joel who is 18, a sophomore studying physics.
As I ate, talked, laughed & got to know these amazing people that I now have the priviledge of serving alongside this summer; I started to get incredibly excited about what God wants to do on the UP campus through this XA that is still in it's infancy stages. My trepidation continued to grow as I listened to Angie tell me of how XA at UP was birthed, & how everyone around the table had come to be involved. It became obvious that this particular ministry is God breathed and I was suddenly overwhelmed by God's love & desire for the students to know him intimately. I became strangely aware that God is going to use this ministry in a mighty way to impact the nation & sow into His kingdom. That excitment tripled as we sorted the contacts (27 alone from UP!) recieved from the student missions conference the previous week. I left the dinner-meeting with a full belly & an even fuller heart.
As I walked back to the apartment, I couldn't help but feel a deep sense of humility & awe. Humility that God has brought me half way around the world to be apart of something so incredible & special. Awe because I realized that this summer I literally get to watch God perform creatio ex nihilo right before my very eyes with this ministry.
God is speaking, and what is not, will soon be.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Monday, April 4, 2011
Yahweh's Touch
I love how God meets us where we are; at that exact moment, when our soul needs His glorious & healing touch He makes Himself known & felt. This past weekend was fun (and unproductive) but a little rough internally. Today I wasted my time at an interview and didn't quite get all the school work done I'd wanted and on top of all that tomorrow is Tuesday which is my super long day of class. I went to the library tonight to work on some homework and when I came out I was pleasantly surprised by the beauty of the night. The temperature was still warm, the stars were out in full force and the wind was blowing through the trees & the grass. I went back to my room to drop off my stuff and walked out to the swings.
I couldn't help but get excited at the early taste of summer nights. Summer is my favorite season and I eagerly await her arrival every year with GREAT anticipation. My anticipation being compounded by the simple fact that I'll be experiencing my beloved summer nights in the Philippines-making them all the more magical.
I sat down at the swing, then slouched down, and stared up at the night sky. I marveled at the stars and the creativity of Him who made me. As I sat in awe of such a beautiful night I couldn't help but wonder if these were the same stars that Yahweh had told Abraham to count as He promised to make him a father of many nations. I wondered if these were the very same stars that Noah saw as he looked out from his ark night after night. I wondered if these were the same stars that the Israelites gazed upon as they stood outside their tents every night for 40 years as they wandered in the wilderness. I wondered if these were the same stars that the Exiles beheld as they prayed for Yahweh to deliver them out of captivity & back to the Promised Land. And I wondered if these were the exact same stars that the wise men had calculated and followed when the fullness of time had finally come (Galatians 4:4) to the humble birth of our Savior. As I sat and dwelled upon this I was reminded of Hebrews 12:1-2 ish. "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders, and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perserverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus the pioneer & perfecter of our faith." I became overwhelmed by the thought of all those who had come before me & yet oddly connected by the simple fact that we are all a part of something so much bigger than ourselves.
I slouched some more as the wind picked up, swaying the swing, blowing my hair and whistling in my ears; I was once again strangley comforted by the fact that God is all around me. I smiled as I remembered one of my Profs teaching that God is a "Prepositional God" (prepositions denote position) He is beneath us, above us, behind us, before us, near us and most importantly, in us. I realized that one of the perks of serving a living God who is prepositional (among other things), is that I am never truly alone. Yahweh, The Great I AM, El Roi-He sees me, He knows me and He loves me. I find unfathomable solace in this divine fact.
Yahweh SEES you, He KNOWS you & He LOVES you, did you know that?!
"I pray that you being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord's people, to grasp how wide and long, and high and deep is the love of Christ." Ephesians 3:17-18
I couldn't help but get excited at the early taste of summer nights. Summer is my favorite season and I eagerly await her arrival every year with GREAT anticipation. My anticipation being compounded by the simple fact that I'll be experiencing my beloved summer nights in the Philippines-making them all the more magical.
I sat down at the swing, then slouched down, and stared up at the night sky. I marveled at the stars and the creativity of Him who made me. As I sat in awe of such a beautiful night I couldn't help but wonder if these were the same stars that Yahweh had told Abraham to count as He promised to make him a father of many nations. I wondered if these were the very same stars that Noah saw as he looked out from his ark night after night. I wondered if these were the same stars that the Israelites gazed upon as they stood outside their tents every night for 40 years as they wandered in the wilderness. I wondered if these were the same stars that the Exiles beheld as they prayed for Yahweh to deliver them out of captivity & back to the Promised Land. And I wondered if these were the exact same stars that the wise men had calculated and followed when the fullness of time had finally come (Galatians 4:4) to the humble birth of our Savior. As I sat and dwelled upon this I was reminded of Hebrews 12:1-2 ish. "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders, and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perserverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus the pioneer & perfecter of our faith." I became overwhelmed by the thought of all those who had come before me & yet oddly connected by the simple fact that we are all a part of something so much bigger than ourselves.
I slouched some more as the wind picked up, swaying the swing, blowing my hair and whistling in my ears; I was once again strangley comforted by the fact that God is all around me. I smiled as I remembered one of my Profs teaching that God is a "Prepositional God" (prepositions denote position) He is beneath us, above us, behind us, before us, near us and most importantly, in us. I realized that one of the perks of serving a living God who is prepositional (among other things), is that I am never truly alone. Yahweh, The Great I AM, El Roi-He sees me, He knows me and He loves me. I find unfathomable solace in this divine fact.
Yahweh SEES you, He KNOWS you & He LOVES you, did you know that?!
"I pray that you being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord's people, to grasp how wide and long, and high and deep is the love of Christ." Ephesians 3:17-18
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Under Construction
This past weekend, the church I attend had their annual woman's retreat and while I did not go, some of the girls from my community group went and shared a little of what God revealed to them over the weekend. A friend shared about how she realized that God takes pleasure in refining us to make us look more and more like Him. That too Him it's exciting & not a hassle or a disappointment to have to be continually scooping off all that dross as with every scoop He is able to see a little more of His reflection in us which is an impressive & miraculous thought since all this takes place on this side of heaven in the midst of sin & rebellion.
John Piper makes an interesting point that God is specifically compared to a refiner's fire and not, say..... a forrest fire or an incinerator's fire; for a forrest fire destroys indiscriminantly and an incinerator consumes EVERYTHING. But a refiner's fire is specific and methodical. The purpose of the refiner's fire is to purify and burn away anything that takes away from it's value; leaving the silver or gold in much better condition. Ultimately as believers the goal of refinement is to become more and more like Christ. The Scriptures tell us some of the specific benefits of being refined. Romans 5:3-4 tells us that refinement prouduces endurance/perserverance, which in turn produces character and that character results in hope which will never disappoint or put us to shame. James 1:1-4 declares that refinement produces perserverance and that perserverance works to make the believer mature, complete and lacking in nothing. All this to say that while the furnance of the refiner is grueling and brutal, the results are of eternal value and should be embraced. Our God is one who redeems & refines in the midst of brokeness, creating beautiful things from the dust and creating beautiful things out of us.
Today I was working on homework and listening to pandora and a song called "Change in the Making" by Addison Road came on. *Shameless plug: Addison Road is an awesome band with powerful & honest lyrics & you should definitely check them out!* The lyrics to this song are part of what inspired this post so enjoy!
There's a better version of me
That I can't quite see
But things are gonna change
But right now I'm a total mess and
Right now I'm completely incomplete
But things are gonna change
'Cause you're not through with me yet
>Chorus:
This is a redemption story
With every step that I'm taking
Everyday you're chipping away
What I don't need
This is me under construction
This is my pride being broken
And everyday I'm closer to who I'm meant to be
I'm a change in the making
Wish I could live more patiently
Wish I could give a little more of me
Without stopping to think twice
Wish I had faith like a little child
Wish I could walk a single mile
Without tripping on my own feet
Chorus
From the dawn of history
You make new and you redeem
From a broken world to a broken heart
You finish what you start in everything
Like a river rolls into the sea
We're not who we're going to be
But things are going to change
Chorus
I'm a change in the making
I'm not who I'm going to be
I'm moving closer to your
glory
John Piper makes an interesting point that God is specifically compared to a refiner's fire and not, say..... a forrest fire or an incinerator's fire; for a forrest fire destroys indiscriminantly and an incinerator consumes EVERYTHING. But a refiner's fire is specific and methodical. The purpose of the refiner's fire is to purify and burn away anything that takes away from it's value; leaving the silver or gold in much better condition. Ultimately as believers the goal of refinement is to become more and more like Christ. The Scriptures tell us some of the specific benefits of being refined. Romans 5:3-4 tells us that refinement prouduces endurance/perserverance, which in turn produces character and that character results in hope which will never disappoint or put us to shame. James 1:1-4 declares that refinement produces perserverance and that perserverance works to make the believer mature, complete and lacking in nothing. All this to say that while the furnance of the refiner is grueling and brutal, the results are of eternal value and should be embraced. Our God is one who redeems & refines in the midst of brokeness, creating beautiful things from the dust and creating beautiful things out of us.
Today I was working on homework and listening to pandora and a song called "Change in the Making" by Addison Road came on. *Shameless plug: Addison Road is an awesome band with powerful & honest lyrics & you should definitely check them out!* The lyrics to this song are part of what inspired this post so enjoy!
There's a better version of me
That I can't quite see
But things are gonna change
But right now I'm a total mess and
Right now I'm completely incomplete
But things are gonna change
'Cause you're not through with me yet
>Chorus:
This is a redemption story
With every step that I'm taking
Everyday you're chipping away
What I don't need
This is me under construction
This is my pride being broken
And everyday I'm closer to who I'm meant to be
I'm a change in the making
Wish I could live more patiently
Wish I could give a little more of me
Without stopping to think twice
Wish I had faith like a little child
Wish I could walk a single mile
Without tripping on my own feet
Chorus
From the dawn of history
You make new and you redeem
From a broken world to a broken heart
You finish what you start in everything
Like a river rolls into the sea
We're not who we're going to be
But things are going to change
Chorus
I'm a change in the making
I'm not who I'm going to be
I'm moving closer to your
glory
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Great Expectations Vol. II
"God is bigger than our expectations." These words were spoken by a very wise woman a few weeks ago at the Monday night bible study I attend. These six words..... this simple statement..... has had an intensely profound effect on my outlook of life. For the past 5 months I have been internally grappling with this idea of expectations. This cosmic wrestling match has affected my mood, my self talk, and my relationship with God. I've been trying to understand what it is to have biblical expectations while trying to figure out & weed through my own fleshly & self-imposed expectations on life & God. I've been trying to sort through all of this for 2 main reasons. The first being for own peace of mind and the second being that I am required to do a missions internship as part of my graduation stipulations and I knew with everything inside of me, that I would never be able to behold & recieve all that God had for me on this internship unless we got this sorted out. This particular thing had become a bit of a roadblock for me and built an un-intentional wall between myself & my Savior. BUT.......
God in his good and perfect timing spoke these beautiful and impactful words through a friend, completely changing my perspective on this particular issue. "God is bigger than our expectations." To be human is to have expectations & to have expectations is to be human. I've realized that many times I create unconcious expectations about various things and am upset or flustered when they don't come to furtution without really understanding why, and other times I make intentional expectations of how something should go and am really thrown into a frenzy when it doesn't happen. Immediately following something like this begins the process of dealing with the disappointment and reconciling my damaged ego to His sovereignty & confidence.
"God is bigger than our expectations." This is what I am learning from this simple yet profound statement. My self-imposed expectations are a result of only being able to see a miniscule piece of the bigger picture. I'm learning that a lot of my expectations are me focused instead of Him focused. I am learning that God wants to do so much more than what I can imagine-in fact, God being bigger than my expectations means that He wants "to do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine according to His power that is within us." (Ephesians 3:20) That word immeasurable means: impossible to measure/limitless or vast. Sounds vaguely reminiscent of one of God's attributes does it not? Only an infinite God could be bigger than my expectations & for that, I'm incredibly grateful.
So for this current stage of life these are the kinds of expectations I can have in Him.
I can expect God to do what is good in all situations. I can expect God to meet me where I am, regardless of my condition. I can expect Him to continue to teach me so that I may proceed in growth towards spiritual maturity. I can expect Him to stretch me, refine me & break me as He sees fit. I can expect to be used by God as He deems worthy. I can expect encouragement when I do right and loving rebuke when I do wrong. I can expect to be led & redirected by His Spirit to accomplish His purposes. These are the expectations that I can live in day by day.
"God is bigger than our expectations." With this thought, everything has changed. With this thought, things will never be the same. Lord I pray that I never forget this very important & insightful lesson that You have taught me these past 5 months.
God in his good and perfect timing spoke these beautiful and impactful words through a friend, completely changing my perspective on this particular issue. "God is bigger than our expectations." To be human is to have expectations & to have expectations is to be human. I've realized that many times I create unconcious expectations about various things and am upset or flustered when they don't come to furtution without really understanding why, and other times I make intentional expectations of how something should go and am really thrown into a frenzy when it doesn't happen. Immediately following something like this begins the process of dealing with the disappointment and reconciling my damaged ego to His sovereignty & confidence.
"God is bigger than our expectations." This is what I am learning from this simple yet profound statement. My self-imposed expectations are a result of only being able to see a miniscule piece of the bigger picture. I'm learning that a lot of my expectations are me focused instead of Him focused. I am learning that God wants to do so much more than what I can imagine-in fact, God being bigger than my expectations means that He wants "to do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine according to His power that is within us." (Ephesians 3:20) That word immeasurable means: impossible to measure/limitless or vast. Sounds vaguely reminiscent of one of God's attributes does it not? Only an infinite God could be bigger than my expectations & for that, I'm incredibly grateful.
So for this current stage of life these are the kinds of expectations I can have in Him.
I can expect God to do what is good in all situations. I can expect God to meet me where I am, regardless of my condition. I can expect Him to continue to teach me so that I may proceed in growth towards spiritual maturity. I can expect Him to stretch me, refine me & break me as He sees fit. I can expect to be used by God as He deems worthy. I can expect encouragement when I do right and loving rebuke when I do wrong. I can expect to be led & redirected by His Spirit to accomplish His purposes. These are the expectations that I can live in day by day.
"God is bigger than our expectations." With this thought, everything has changed. With this thought, things will never be the same. Lord I pray that I never forget this very important & insightful lesson that You have taught me these past 5 months.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Great Expectations: Vol. I
I haven't written a post in ages because I've been wrestling with the God that I adore, & am just now feeling composed (and brave) enough to share.
At the opening of the new year I am finding myself really wrestling with what kind(s) of expectations I am to have for 2011 if any at all. Generally speaking, I love the coming of a new year, I eagerly await it because I love the feeling of new possibilities and a fresh start to strengthen my weaknesses and delve deeper into all that the Lord wants to teach me. I am usually filled with anticipation at the prospects of new adventures fraught with the reality of meeting new people, while also getting to deepen already existing relationships. This however, is not the case at the start of 2011-quite the opposite to be honest. At the opening of this new year I am filled with apprehension, hesitation, cyncism & apathy. I have some distrust & a rotten atittude. I find myself weary & confused, stuck in a mental trapping of my own design-created by feasting on the lies of Satan rather than on the truths of my Father.
At the close of 2010 and the start of 2011, I find my life looking nothing like what I had hoped or expected it to & completely clueless as to the direction that it's headed. I read a qoute yesterday that said "While we cannot direct the wind, we can adjust our sails." I find myself really struggling with the adjusting & redirecting part. I'm still having an incredibly hard time finding my bearings & catching my breath, while trying to get re-oriented into a proper state of mind. All of this has led to my current disdain/battle towards the creation of expectations for this year. The cyncism within says why bother? Creating expectations will only lead to disappointment, especially when made in a world that I was not created for. I know that I don't ever want to feel this way again and it would appear that the easiest way to ascertain that would be to forfeit having any expectations.
However, I very much recognize how unrealistic & ridiculous this notion is thus better phrasing my conflict. My conflict here is that I am struggling to find & understand Biblically, what kind of expectations I as a believer am to have-in general and from year to year. My conflict at this moment is that while I am aware that I need to let go of my selfish & self-centered expectations, I have no idea what to replace them with. I do not know how to let go of the expectations that I previously held, to make room for the ones that God wants to give me; and even if I did know how, at this current moment I am paralyzed with the fear of disappointment, preventing me from stepping out in faith. I had a much needed conversation with an incredibly wise friend who told me that all I can do is have expectations for that day. I can't hold onto the expectations of yesterday or the possible expectations of tomorrow. All I can do is have expectations for that day & I can expect to have different ones for the following day. I'm still ruminating on this bit of wisdom but later thoughts on this can be expected.
"I do not seek to understand that I may believe, but I believe in order to understand."-Anselm
At the opening of the new year I am finding myself really wrestling with what kind(s) of expectations I am to have for 2011 if any at all. Generally speaking, I love the coming of a new year, I eagerly await it because I love the feeling of new possibilities and a fresh start to strengthen my weaknesses and delve deeper into all that the Lord wants to teach me. I am usually filled with anticipation at the prospects of new adventures fraught with the reality of meeting new people, while also getting to deepen already existing relationships. This however, is not the case at the start of 2011-quite the opposite to be honest. At the opening of this new year I am filled with apprehension, hesitation, cyncism & apathy. I have some distrust & a rotten atittude. I find myself weary & confused, stuck in a mental trapping of my own design-created by feasting on the lies of Satan rather than on the truths of my Father.
At the close of 2010 and the start of 2011, I find my life looking nothing like what I had hoped or expected it to & completely clueless as to the direction that it's headed. I read a qoute yesterday that said "While we cannot direct the wind, we can adjust our sails." I find myself really struggling with the adjusting & redirecting part. I'm still having an incredibly hard time finding my bearings & catching my breath, while trying to get re-oriented into a proper state of mind. All of this has led to my current disdain/battle towards the creation of expectations for this year. The cyncism within says why bother? Creating expectations will only lead to disappointment, especially when made in a world that I was not created for. I know that I don't ever want to feel this way again and it would appear that the easiest way to ascertain that would be to forfeit having any expectations.
However, I very much recognize how unrealistic & ridiculous this notion is thus better phrasing my conflict. My conflict here is that I am struggling to find & understand Biblically, what kind of expectations I as a believer am to have-in general and from year to year. My conflict at this moment is that while I am aware that I need to let go of my selfish & self-centered expectations, I have no idea what to replace them with. I do not know how to let go of the expectations that I previously held, to make room for the ones that God wants to give me; and even if I did know how, at this current moment I am paralyzed with the fear of disappointment, preventing me from stepping out in faith. I had a much needed conversation with an incredibly wise friend who told me that all I can do is have expectations for that day. I can't hold onto the expectations of yesterday or the possible expectations of tomorrow. All I can do is have expectations for that day & I can expect to have different ones for the following day. I'm still ruminating on this bit of wisdom but later thoughts on this can be expected.
"I do not seek to understand that I may believe, but I believe in order to understand."-Anselm
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
You Got the Love
In the last week I've fallen in love with a band called "Florence and the Machine" I heard their song "Dog Days Are Over" in the movie "Eat.Pray.Love" & again at the end of last night's Glee episode. Their debut album called "Lungs" is fantastic & I highly recommend checking it out. I swiped it from a friend & was highly impressed. If indie rock & soul music had a baby, it would be Florence and the Machine. :) I'll get back to why this is relevant in a second.
Since mid October I have been learning what it means for God to be my sustainer. I have always heard people say that God gives them strength or energy or that He sustains them, but I've never really understood what that meant, til recently. I think this is one of those things that you can't ever truly understand or get until it happens to you. Currently God is transferring head knowledge to heart wisdom & its stunning yet grueling.
I've been running on empty since mid October for various reasons & just really feeling like life's bitch. Now when I say empty, i mean empty like, there is absolutely NOTHING in the tank . At the top of every hour I literally pray for God to help me survive the next hour while thanking Him for helping me survive the previous one. God being my sustainer means that I am accutely aware of just how dependent upon Him I am for EVERYTHING. I think I've always known this in my head, but now I'm learning it in my heart. A.W Tozer puts it like this in his book "Knowledge of the Holy" "God is our environment the way water is to fish and air is to birds." If either one of these animals is removed from its essential living environment, it dies-so it is with man & God.
I must say though, that there is something breath-takingly beautiful about being in a place where you are so aware of your need for God. There is something exquisite & encouraging about a God who will empty you completely so that He can fill you up with all that He is, which is always more than enough. There is something totally ravishing about a God who draws near to His people in times of trials & doubt. And there is something absolutely resplendent about a God who actually makes us stronger, better people in the midst of our weaknesses. And what's more sublime is that all this ONLY makes sense in the topsy-turvy, seemingly upside down kingdom of God.
Now back to Florence and the Machine. On their album that I swiped with the utmost respect, the last track is called "You've Got the Love" and its a cover by another band called "The Source" The lyrics are powerful, relevant & honest (and it has a catchy beat!). Here they are:
Sometimes i feel like throwing my hands up in the air
I know I can count on you
Sometimes I feel like saying "Lord I just don't care"
But you've got the love I need to see me through
Sometimes it seems that the going is just too rough
And things go wrong no matter what I do
Now and then it seems that life is just too much
But you've got the love I need to see me through
When food is gone you are my daily meal
When friends are gone I know my Saviour's love is real
Your love is real
You got the love (6X's)
Time after time I think "Oh Lord, what's the use?"
Time after time I think it's just no good
Sooner or later in life, the things you love you loose
But you've got the love I need to see me through
You've got the love (6x's)
Sometimes I feel like throwing my hands up in the air
I know I can count on you
Sometimes I feel like saying "Lord I just don't care"
But you've got the love I need to see me through.
Since mid October I have been learning what it means for God to be my sustainer. I have always heard people say that God gives them strength or energy or that He sustains them, but I've never really understood what that meant, til recently. I think this is one of those things that you can't ever truly understand or get until it happens to you. Currently God is transferring head knowledge to heart wisdom & its stunning yet grueling.
I've been running on empty since mid October for various reasons & just really feeling like life's bitch. Now when I say empty, i mean empty like, there is absolutely NOTHING in the tank . At the top of every hour I literally pray for God to help me survive the next hour while thanking Him for helping me survive the previous one. God being my sustainer means that I am accutely aware of just how dependent upon Him I am for EVERYTHING. I think I've always known this in my head, but now I'm learning it in my heart. A.W Tozer puts it like this in his book "Knowledge of the Holy" "God is our environment the way water is to fish and air is to birds." If either one of these animals is removed from its essential living environment, it dies-so it is with man & God.
I must say though, that there is something breath-takingly beautiful about being in a place where you are so aware of your need for God. There is something exquisite & encouraging about a God who will empty you completely so that He can fill you up with all that He is, which is always more than enough. There is something totally ravishing about a God who draws near to His people in times of trials & doubt. And there is something absolutely resplendent about a God who actually makes us stronger, better people in the midst of our weaknesses. And what's more sublime is that all this ONLY makes sense in the topsy-turvy, seemingly upside down kingdom of God.
Now back to Florence and the Machine. On their album that I swiped with the utmost respect, the last track is called "You've Got the Love" and its a cover by another band called "The Source" The lyrics are powerful, relevant & honest (and it has a catchy beat!). Here they are:
Sometimes i feel like throwing my hands up in the air
I know I can count on you
Sometimes I feel like saying "Lord I just don't care"
But you've got the love I need to see me through
Sometimes it seems that the going is just too rough
And things go wrong no matter what I do
Now and then it seems that life is just too much
But you've got the love I need to see me through
When food is gone you are my daily meal
When friends are gone I know my Saviour's love is real
Your love is real
You got the love (6X's)
Time after time I think "Oh Lord, what's the use?"
Time after time I think it's just no good
Sooner or later in life, the things you love you loose
But you've got the love I need to see me through
You've got the love (6x's)
Sometimes I feel like throwing my hands up in the air
I know I can count on you
Sometimes I feel like saying "Lord I just don't care"
But you've got the love I need to see me through.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Waiting...
About a month ago, life as I knew it, came to a complete stand still. All future plans flew out the window right before my eyes, & I was left standing with one hand in my pocket & the other hand scratching my head; wondering what was next, & experiencing a complete spectrum of emotions. Currenty I'm still in that place while simultaneously learning the things that God is trying to teach me.
One of the lessons I'm learning is how to wait in Him. Waiting, I used to think was inter-changeable with patience but I'm learnng that while the two are closely related there are some differences between the two. I think that waiting is a place, a state of being-while patience is a by-product of learning to live in that place. I think that waiting is a season, it comes and goes like fall & spring but with much less predictability, while patience is to be exercised at all times & in all seasons of life. I am also learning about my myself that I have never ever really been forced to stop and appreciate the beauty of being in a season of waiting. I know this is largely in part caused by the fact that I struggle with contentment & as a result, my mindset is constantly thinking that the grass is always greener somewhere else. I have also become aware of the fact that I severly lack patience. Thus learning to live in a season of waiting with little to no patience has been a little rough to say the least, but by His strength He makes it easier with each passing day and by His grace I recognize more & more the beauty of this place.
"Because of the Lord's great love, we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, the Lord is my portion; therefore, i will wait for him." -Lamentations 3:22-24-
I am also learning the implications of valuing the journey more than the destination. As of now I have absolutely no idea of what I'm doing or where im going after I get back from my internship in Italy the end of July. [though I think I hear Phoenix calling my name ;)] It has become clear to me that I am at the mercy of God, that I have NO control over anything happening around me. The only thing I can control, is my response to the situations around me. Through God's grace I am choosing to learn all that He has to teach me with an atittude of humility & joy. I'm learning on this journey, that while I have never felt more out of control about the things around me, have also never felt more freedom in knowing that God is guiding my steps each and everyday- whether I can see it or not & regardless of where He will lead me in the long run. I'm learning that valuing the journey more than the destination means living in the moment, making the most of every opportunity God presents, having the sense to know when God is moving & responding accordingly. Being on the journey means living in the here & now as if it were my last, because I'm not promised tomorrow. Ultimately I'm learning what it means to enjoy the journey in this season of waiting, as ironic as it sounds & I know that when it's time to head to the next place God will let me know, in His own way, & in His own time.
"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, 'This is the way, walk in it'" -Isaiah 30:21-
One of the lessons I'm learning is how to wait in Him. Waiting, I used to think was inter-changeable with patience but I'm learnng that while the two are closely related there are some differences between the two. I think that waiting is a place, a state of being-while patience is a by-product of learning to live in that place. I think that waiting is a season, it comes and goes like fall & spring but with much less predictability, while patience is to be exercised at all times & in all seasons of life. I am also learning about my myself that I have never ever really been forced to stop and appreciate the beauty of being in a season of waiting. I know this is largely in part caused by the fact that I struggle with contentment & as a result, my mindset is constantly thinking that the grass is always greener somewhere else. I have also become aware of the fact that I severly lack patience. Thus learning to live in a season of waiting with little to no patience has been a little rough to say the least, but by His strength He makes it easier with each passing day and by His grace I recognize more & more the beauty of this place.
"Because of the Lord's great love, we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, the Lord is my portion; therefore, i will wait for him." -Lamentations 3:22-24-
I am also learning the implications of valuing the journey more than the destination. As of now I have absolutely no idea of what I'm doing or where im going after I get back from my internship in Italy the end of July. [though I think I hear Phoenix calling my name ;)] It has become clear to me that I am at the mercy of God, that I have NO control over anything happening around me. The only thing I can control, is my response to the situations around me. Through God's grace I am choosing to learn all that He has to teach me with an atittude of humility & joy. I'm learning on this journey, that while I have never felt more out of control about the things around me, have also never felt more freedom in knowing that God is guiding my steps each and everyday- whether I can see it or not & regardless of where He will lead me in the long run. I'm learning that valuing the journey more than the destination means living in the moment, making the most of every opportunity God presents, having the sense to know when God is moving & responding accordingly. Being on the journey means living in the here & now as if it were my last, because I'm not promised tomorrow. Ultimately I'm learning what it means to enjoy the journey in this season of waiting, as ironic as it sounds & I know that when it's time to head to the next place God will let me know, in His own way, & in His own time.
"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, 'This is the way, walk in it'" -Isaiah 30:21-
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)